Round Up

Cinema
Good – The Incredibles
Bad – Eyes Without a Face (Les Yeux Sans Visages)
Fugly – After The Sunset

Cellar
Red – Geyser Peak Reserve Cabernet Sauvignon, Alexander Valley 1999
White – Joel Gott 2003 Chardonnay, Hyde Vineyards, Napa Valley
Bubbles – Freixenet Reserva Real

Cocktail
The Hurricane was invented during WWII at Pat O’Briends in NOLA named after the shape of a hurricane lamp. They still sell their original mix in the French Quarter.
Shake 2 oz light rum, 2 oz dark rum, 2 oz passionfruit juice, 1 oz OJ, 0.5 oz fresh lime juice, 1 tbs simple syrup and 1 tbs in shaker with ice. Strain into hurricane glass and garnish with cherry and an orange slice.

Gogh away

The family of Ryoei Saito, who inherited a Van Gogh fromt he late chaiman of former Daishowa Paper Manufacturing Company had a tax penalty on thier inherited assets reduced by 1 billion yen today by the Shizuoka District Court. In 1989, Yasuda Marine and Fire Issurance company paid $39.9 million for “Sunflowers“, at the time the world’s most expensive painting. That record has since been surpassed: it is curently held by Piccaso’s Garcon a la Pipe (from the Whitney collection) sold to an anonymous buyer for $104,168,000.

Many of us identify with the roadblocks that VincentVan Gogh (born this day) experienced in his many career and romantic pursuits, all ending in failure. His reaction to these experiences demonstrated a biological and psychological abnormality causing behaviors that further alientated people from him. He became progressively isolated and channeled his energy into painting. He was institutionalized and then committed suicide at 37.

The only painting he sold in his lifetime was four (4) months before he died is called “The Red Vineyard“. Review a complete online catalog of his works or check out his life and depressing times.

CAUTION: LANGUAGE
Another brilliant person who was obviously disturbed was Mitch Hedberg. I rate him as a superior stand-up comic but he allegedly had drug issues. Unfortunate. He passed from heart failure ina hotel room in New Jersey earlier today. Some of my favorite material is reproduced below.
* I think foosball is a combination of soccer and shish kabobs.
* I think pickles are cucumbers that sold out. They sold their soul to the devil, and the devil is dill.
* I think Pringles’ initial intention was to make tennis balls. But on the day that the rubber was supposed to show up, a big truckload of potatoes arrived. But pringles was a chill company so they said “Fuck it. Cut ‘em up.”
* I don’t have a girlfriend. I just know this lady who’d be really mad if she heard me say that.
* Your curveball won’t curve. Because you’re twelve.
* I once saw a forklift lift a crate of forks. And it was way too literal for me.
* You know when they have a fishing show on TV? They catch the fish and then let it go. They don’t want to eat the fish; they just want to make it late for something.
* I got an ant farm. Them fellas don’t grow shit.
* I wanted to buy a candle holder, but the store didn’t have one. So I got a cake.
* I haven’t slept for ten days, because that would be too long.
* I was in downtown Boise, Idaho, and I saw a duck, and I knew the duck was lost, ’cause ducks ain’t s’posed to be downtown. There’s nothin’ for ‘em there. So I went to a Subway sandwich shop, I said, “Let me have a bun.” But she wouldn’t sell me just the bun, she said that I had to have something on it. She told me it’s against regulations for Subway to sell just the bun. I guess the two halves ain’t supposed to touch. So I said, “Alright, well, put some lettuce on it,” which she did. She said, “That’ll be $1.75.” I said, “It’s for a duck.” And they said, “All right, well, that is free.” See, I did not know that. Ducks eat for free at Subway! Had I known that, I would have ordered a much larger sandwich. “Let me have the Steak Fajita Sub – but don’t bother ringing it up, it’s for a duck! There are six ducks out there, and they all want Sun Chips!”
* I hate turtlenecks. I have such a weak neck. Plus if you wear a turtleneck it’s like being strangled by a really weak guy … all day. And if you wear a turtleneck and a backpack it’s like a weak midget trying to bring you down.
* I tried to throw away a yo-yo. It was fucking impossible.
* I tried to walk into Target, but I missed. Damn.
* Whenever I walk, people try to hand me out fliers. And when someone tries to hand me out a flier, it’s kinda like they’re saying, “Here — you throw this away.”
* Last week I helped my friend stay put. It’s a lot easier than helping someone move. I just went over to his house and made sure that he did not start to load shit into a truck.
* I’m sick of following my dreams. I’m just going to ask them where they’re goin’ and hook up with them later.
* I got my hair highlighted, because I felt some strands were more important than others.
* I want to be a race car passenger; just a guy who bugs the driver. “Say man, can I turn on the radio? You should slow down. Why do we gotta keep going in circles? Man, you really like Tide …”
* I wrote a letter to my dad — I wrote, “I really enjoy being here,” but I accidentally wrote rarely instead of really. But I still wanted to use it so I crossed it out and wrote, “I rarely drive steamboats, dad — there’s a lot of shit you don’t know about me. Quit trying to act like I’m a steamboat operator.” This letter took a harsh turn right away …
…and then at the end of the letter I like to write “P.S. — This is what part of the alphabet would look like if Q and R were eliminated.”
* I don’t get it, is it a Hippopatamus or a Really-Cool-Styling-O-Patamus?
* I got in an argument with a girlfriend inside of a tent. That’s a bad place for an argument, because then I tried to walk out and slam the flap. How are you supposed to express your anger in this situation? Zipper it up really quick?
* I type at 101 words a minute. But it’s in my own language.
* I think Bigfoot is blurry, that’s the problem. It’s not the photographer’s fault. Bigfoot is blurry. And that’s extra scary to me, because there’s a large, out-of-focus monster roaming the countryside. Run. He’s fuzzy. Get outta here.
* I have an underwater camera just in case I crash my car into a river, and at the last minute I see a photo opportunity of a fish that I have never seen.
* One time a guy handed me a picture of himself, and he said, “Here’s a picture of me when I was younger.” Every picture of you is of when you were younger. Here’s a picture of me when I am older. You son of a bitch, how’d you pull that off? Let me see that camera …
* My roommate says, “I need to shave and use the shower. Does anyone need to use the bathroom?” It’s like some weird-ass quiz where he reveals the answer first… Every time I go and shave, I assume there is somebody else on the planet shaving as well, so I say “I’m gonna go shave too.”
* Sometimes I wave to people I don’t know. It is very dangerous to wave to people you don’t know, because what if they don’t have a hand? They’ll think you’re cocky. “Look what I got motherfucker, this thing is useful…I’m gonna go pick something up.”
* My sister wanted to be an actress, but she never made it. She does live in a trailer. She got half way. She’s an actress, she just never gets called to the set.
* On a traffic light green means go and yellow means yield, but on a banana it’s just the opposite. Green means hold on, yellow means go ahead, and red means where the fuck did you get that banana at …
* I’m against picketing, but I don’t know how to show it.
* An escalator can never break. It can only become stairs. You would never see a escalator “Temporarily Out of Order” sign, just “Escalator Temporarily Stairs… Sorry for the Convenience … We apologize for the fact that you can still get up there.”
* I was walking down the street with my friend and he said “I hear music.” As though there’s any other way to take it in. You’re not special. That’s how I receive it too … I tried to taste it, but it did not work …
* 2-in-1 is a bullshit term, because 1 is not big enough to hold 2. That’s why 2 was created.
* I have a cheese-shredder at home, which is its positive name. They don’t call it by its negative name, which is sponge-ruiner. Because I wanted to clean it, and now I have little bits of sponge that would melt easily over tortilla chips.
* I know a lot about cars. I can look at a car’s headlights and tell you exactly which way it’s coming.
* I use the word totally too much. I need to change it up and use a word that is different but has the same meaning. Mitch do you like submarine sandwhiches? All-encompassingly …
* This jacket is dry clean only. Which means … it’s dirty.
* I saw a human pyramid once. It was very unnecessary. It did not need to exist.
* I bought a seven-dollar pen because I always lose pens and I got sick of not caring.
* I played golf. I’m not good at golf, I never got good at it, I never got a hole in one … but I did hit a guy. And that’s way more satisfying. … You’re supposed to yell ‘fore,’ but I was way too busy mumbling, “There ain’t no way that’s gonna hit him.”
* I have a friend who is a juggler. When I go to his house I don’t like to take food from him if it is in threes. “He has three apples left … I guess I can’t have one.”
* At my hotel room, my friend came over and asked to use the phone. I said “Certainly.” He said “Do I need to dial 9?” I say “Yeah. Especially if it’s in the number. You can try 4 and 5 back to back real quick.”
* My lucky number is 4 billion. That doesn’t come in real handy when you’re gambling. “Come on, 4 billion! Fuck. Seven. Not even close. I need more dice.”
* I love blackjack. But I’m not addicted to gambling. I’m addicted to sitting in a semicircle.
* I went to the park and saw this kid flying a kite. The kid was really excited. I don’t know why, that’s what they’re supposed to do. Now if he had had a chair on the other end of that string, I would have been impressed.
* If you had a friend who was a tightrope walker, and you were walking down a sidewalk, and he fell, that would be completely unacceptable.
* I don’t own a cell phone or a pager. I just hang around everyone I know, all the time. If someone needs to get a hold of me they just say “Mitch,” and I say “What?” and turn my head slightly …
* I hope the next time I move I get a real easy phone number. Something like, 222-2222. I would say sweet. People would say, “Mitch, how do I get a hold of you?” I would say, “Press 2 for a while, and when I answer, you will know that you have pressed 2 enough.”
* I wrote a script for a guy, and he said he liked it but he thought that I need to rewrite it. I said, “Fuck that, I’ll just make a copy.”
* I don’t wear a watch because I want my arms to weigh the same. So if somebody asks me what time it is, I have to tell them something that is going on. “What time is it, Mitch?” “Uh, that guy is eating a hamburger.” “Shit, I had to be somewhere …”
* My friend said to me “Man, this weather is trippy.” I said to him, “No man, perhaps it is not the weather that is trippy, it is the way we perceive it that is indeed trippy …” then I thought, man, I should have just said, ‘yeah’ …
* Foosball fucked up my perception of soccer. I thought you had to kick the ball and then spin ’round and round. I can’t do a back flip, much less several … simultaneously with two other guys.
* I never joined the army because at ease was never that easy to me. Seemed rather uptight still. I don’t relax by parting my legs slightly and putting my hands behind my back. That does not equal ease. At ease was not being in the military. I am at ease, bro, because I am not in the military.
* The depressing thing about tennis is that no matter how much I play, I’ll never be as good as a wall. I played a wall once. They’re fucking relentless.
* A severed foot is the ultimate stocking stuffer.
* I used to be a hot-tar roofer. Yeah, I remember that … day.
* I used to do drugs. I still do, but I used to, too.
* My friend said to me, “You know what I like? Mashed potatoes.” I was like, “Dude, you have to give me time to guess. If you’re going to quiz me you have to insert a pause.”
* I went to see a band in New York. The lead singer got on the microphone, and he said “How many of you people feel like human beings tonight?” Then he said “How many of you feel like animals?” And everyone cheered after the animals part. But the thing is, I cheered after the human being part because I did not know that there was a second part to the question.
* People teach their dogs to sit, it’s a trick. I’ve been sitting my whole life, and a dog has never looked at me as though he thought I was tricky.
* My apartment is infested with koala bears. It was the cutest infestation ever. When I turn on the light, they scatter, but I do not want them to. Don’t run away. I want to hold you … and feed you a leaf.
* In England, Smokey the Bear is not the forest fire prevention representative. They have Smacky the Frog. It’s just like a bear, but it’s a frog. I think it’s a better system, I think we should adopt it. Because bears can be mean, but frogs are always cool. Never has there been a frog hopping toward me, and I thought ‘man, I’d better play dead. Here comes that frog …’ You never say here comes that frog in a nervous manner. It’s always optimistic. Hey here comes that frog, all right. Maybe he’ll come near me so I can pet him, and stick him in a mayonnaise jar, with a stick and a leaf, to recreate what he’s used to. And I’m pretty sure I’d have to punch some holes in the lid, because he’s damn sure used to air. Then I can observe him, and he won’t be doing much in his 16-ounce world.
* Alcoholism is a disease, but it’s the only one you can get yelled at for having. Goddamn it Otto, you are an alcoholic. Goddamn it Otto, you have Lupus … one of those two doesn’t sound right.
* I was at this casino minding my own business, and this guy came up to me and said, “You’re gonna have to move, you’re blocking a fire exit.” As though if there was a fire, I wasn’t gonna run. If you’re flammable and have legs, you are never blocking a fire exit.
* When you go to a restaurant on the weekends and it’s busy they start a waiting list. They start calling out names, they say “Dufresne, party of two. Dufresne, party of two.” And if no one answers they’ll say their name again. “Dufresne, party of two, Dufresne, party of two.” But then if no one answers they’ll just go right on to the next name. “Bush, party of three.” Yeah, but what happened to the Dufresnes? No one seems to give a shit. Who can eat at a time like this – people are missing. You fuckers are selfish… the Dufresnes are in someone’s trunk right now, with duct tape over their mouths. And they’re hungry! That’s a double whammy. We need help. Bush, search party of three! You can eat when you find the Dufresnes.
* See, I write jokes for a living, man. I sit in my hotel at night and think of something that’s funny and then I go get a pen and write ‘em down. Or, if the pen’s too far away, I have to convince myself that what I thought of ain’t funny.
* I bought myself a parrot. The parrot talked. But it did not say, “I’m hungry,”………….. so it died.
* They say that the recipe for Sprite is lemon and lime. But I tried to make it at home. There’s more to it than that.
* I saw a commercial for an above-ground pool. It was 30 seconds long. You know why? ‘Cuz that’s the maximum amount of time that you can depict yourself having fun in an above-ground pool.
* As an adult, I’m not supposed to go down slides. So, if I’m at the top of a slide, I have to pretend like I got there accidentally. “How’d I get up here, Goddamnit!? I guess I have to slide down. WHEEEEEEEEEE!!!” That’s what you say when you’re having fun — you refer to yourself and some other people.
* I had a box of Ritz crackers and on the back of the box of Ritz crackers it had all these suggestions as to what to put on top of the Ritz. It said ‘Try it with turkey and cheese.’ ‘Try it with peanut butter.’ Oh, c’mon man, they’re crackers. That’s why I got ‘em — I like crackers. There ain’t no suggestion: ‘Put a Ritz on top of a Ritz.’ I didn’t buy ‘em ‘cuz they’re little edible plates.
* I like baked potatoes, man. I don’t have a microwave oven; it takes forever to cook a baked potato in a conventional oven. Sometimes I’ll just throw one in there, even if I don’t want one, because by the time it’s done….who knows? I’ll throw a potato in and go on vacation.
* My manager told me, “Mitch, don’t use alcohol as a crutch.” A crutch is something that helps you walk, alcohol is like the step I didn’t see.
* I had a stick of Carefree gum, but it didn’t work. I felt pretty good while I was blowing that bubble, but as soon as the gum lost its flavor, I was back to pondering my mortality.
* My sister wanted to be an actress, but she never made it. She does live in a trailer. She made it half way. She’s an actress, she just never gets called to the set
* If carrots got you drunk, rabbits would be fucked up. I like vending machines, because snacks are better when they fall.
* You know that Pepperidge Farm bread, that stuff is fancy. That stuff is wrapped twice. You open it, and then still ain’t open. That’s why I don’t buy it, I don’t need another step between me and toast.
* This product that was on TV was available for four easy payments of $19.95. I would like a product that was available for three easy payments and one complicated payment. We can’t tell you which payment it is, but one of these payments is going to hard.
* I would imagine if you could understand Morse Code, a tap dancer would drive you crazy.
* I bought a doughnut and they gave me a receipt for the doughnut… I don’t need a receipt for the doughnut. I give you money and you give me the doughnut, end of transaction. We don’t need to bring ink and paper into this. I can’t imagine a scenario that I would have to prove that I bought a doughnut. To some skeptical friend, Don’t even act like I didn’t buy a doughnut, I’ve got the documentation right here… It’s in my file at home. …Under “D”.
* Sometimes I wake up and I think I should start wearing a beret, but I don’t do it though. One day I’m gonna though. You bet your ass, I will have a beret on. That’s ridiculous, but it’s true. I always fight with wearing a beret.
* A minibar is a machine that makes everything expensive. When I take something out of the minibar, I always fathom that I’ll go and replace it before they check it off, but they make that stuff impossible to replace. I go to the store and ask, “Do you have coke in a glass harmonica? …Do you have individually wrapped cashews?”
* I like cinnamon rolls, but I don’t always have time to make a pan. That’s why I wish they would sell cinnamon roll incense. After all I’d rather light a stick and have my roommate wake up with false hopes.
* That would be cool if you could eat a good food with a bad food and the good food would cover for the bad food when it got to your stomach. Like you could eat a carrot with an onion ring and they would travel down to your stomach, then they would get there, and the carrot would say, “It’s cool, he’s with me.”
* I had a bag of Fritos, they were texas grilled Fritos. These Fritos had grill marks on them. They remind me of something, when we used to fire up the barbeque and throw down some Fritos. I can still see my dad with the apron on, better flip that Frito, dad, you know how I like mine
* I hate flossing, I wish I just had one long curvy tooth.
* A waffle is like a pancake with a syrup trap
* I like buying snacks from a vending machine because food is better when it falls. Sometimes at the grocery, I’ll drop a candy bar so that it will achieve its maximum flavor potential.
* I wrote my friend a letter with a highlighting pen, but he could not read it, he thought I was trying to show him certain parts of a piece of paper.
* Mr. Pibb is a poor imitation of Dr. Pepper. Dude didn’t even get his degree
* My friend asked me if I wanted a frozen banana, I said “No, but I want a regular banana later, so, Yeah.”
* When I get a cold sore, I put Carmex on it, because Carmex is supposed to alleviate cold sores. I don’t know if it does help, but it will make them more shiny and noticeable. It’s like cold-sore-highlighter. Maybe they could come up with an arrow that heals cold sores.
* I hate arrows. They try to tell me which direction to go. It’s like “I ain’t going that way, line with two thirds of a triangle on the end!” Imagine if an bow and arrow killed you. That would suck. An arrow killed you? They would never solve the crime. “Look at that dead guy. Let’s go that way.”
* I like to hold the microphone cord like this, I pinch it together and then I let it go, then you hear a whole bunch of jokes all at once.
* I had a stick of Carefree gum, but it didn’t work. I felt pretty good while I was blowing that bubble, but as soon as the gum lost its flavor, I was back to pondering my mortality.
* I hate dreaming. Because when you sleep, you wanna sleep. Dreaming is work, you know – there I am in a comfortable bed, the next thing you know I have to build a go-kart with my ex-landlord. I want a dream of me watching myself sleep.
* I went to the Home Depot, which was unnecessary. I need to go to the Apartment Depot. Which is just a big warehouse with a whole lot of people standing around saying “We don’t have to fix anything.”
* The only way I could get my old CD into stores is if I took one in and leave it. “Sir, you forgot this.” “No, I did not. That is for sale. Please alphabetize it.”
* I cannot tell you what hotel I’m staying at, but there are two trees involved.
* I have a “Do Not Disturb” sign on my hotel door. It’s time to go to “Don’t Disturb”. It’s been “Do Not” for too long. We should embrace the contraction. I like to wear a “Do Not Disturb” sign around my neck so that little kids can’t tell me knock-knock jokes. “Hey, how ya doin’? Knock-knock.” “Read the sign, punk!”
* I met the girl who works at the Doubletree front desk, she gave me her number. It’s ZERO. I tried to call from here, some other woman answered. “You sound older!”
* If 13 is unlucky, then 12 and 14 are guilty by association.
* I like refried beans. That’s why I wanna try fried beans. Maybe they’re just as good, and we’re not wasting time.
* I hate sandwiches at New York delis. Too much meat on the sandwich. It’s like a cow with a cracker on either side. “Would you like anything else with the pastrami sandwich?” “Yeah, a loaf of bread and some other people!”
* I ordered a club sandwich, but I’m not even a member. “I like my sandwiches with three pieces of bread.” “Well, so do I!” “Then let’s form a club.” “OK, but we need some more stipulations. Instead of cutting the sandwich once, let’s cut it again. Yes, four triangles, arranged in a circle, and in the middle we will dump chips.” “How do you feel about frilly toothpicks?” “I’m for ‘em!” “Well, this club is formed.”
* I went to a pizzeria. The guy gave me the smallest slice possible. If the pizza was a pie chart with what would you do if you found a million dollars, he gave me the “Donate it to charity” slice. “I’d like to exchange this for the ‘Keep it!’”
* I saw this wino, he was eating grapes. I said, “Dude, you have to wait.”
* I used to drink wine. This girl asked me, “Doesn’t wine give you a headache?” “Yeah, eventually, but the first and the middle part are amazing!”
* I went to the store and bought eight apples; the clerk said, “Do you want these in a bag?” I said, “Oh, no, man, I juggle.”
* I saw a guy juggling chain saws, it was cool, unless something needed to be sawed down, then it’s annoying.
* The thing about tennis is: no matter how much I play, I’ll never be as good as a wall. I played a wall once. They’re relentless.
* I was going to get my teeth whitened, but I said, “I’ll just get a tan instead.” I got some tartar control toothpaste. I still have tartar, but that stuff’s under control. I got so much tartar, I don’t have to dip my fish sticks in anything. That’s actually kind of gross. After that joke, I have to clarify that I’m just joking.
* You know crazy straws – they go all over the place? These straws are sane. They never lost their mind. They say, “we’re going straight to the mouth. That guy who takes a while to get there? He’s crazy.”
* You know that Pepperidge Farm bread, that stuff is fancy. That stuff is wrapped twice. You open it, and then still ain’t open. That’s why I don’t buy it, I don’t need another step between me and toast.
* I like it when you reach into a vending machine to grab your candy bar, and that flap goes up to block you from reaching up? That’s a good invention. Before that, it was hard times for the vending machine owners. “Yeah, what candy bar are you getting?” “That one, and every one on the bottom row!”
* I want to make a vending machine that sells vending machines. It’d have to be real big. I was going to get a candy bar, the button I was supposed to push is HH. So I pressed the H button twice. Potato chips came out! Turns out there was an HH button. You gotta let me know. I’m not familiar with the concept of HH. I did not learn my AA BB CCs. I get the Reese’s candy bar. You look at that, there’s an apostrophe-s there. That means the candy bar is his. I didn’t know that. Next time you’re eating a Reese’s candy bar, and a guy named Reese comes by and says, “Gimme that”, you better hand it over. The Kit Kat candy bar has the name Kit Kat imprinted into the chocolate. That robs you of chocolate! That’s a clever chocolate-saving technique.
* If you find yourself lost in the woods, build a house. “Well, I was lost, but now I live here!”
* I haven’t slept for ten days, because that would be too long.
* I bought a house, it’s a two bedroom house, but I think it’s up to me to decide how many bedrooms there are. This bedroom has an oven in it. This bedroom has a lot of people sitting around watching TV. This bedroom is over in that other guy’s house.
* I bought a doughnut and they gave me a receipt for the doughnut. I don’t need a receipt for the doughnut. I give you money and you give me the doughnut, end of transaction. We don’t need to bring ink and paper into this. I can’t imagine a scenario that I would have to prove that I bought a doughnut. To some skeptical friend, Don’t even act like I didn’t buy a doughnut, I’ve got the documentation right here. Oh, wait. It’s in my file at home, under “D”.
* I have a king sized bed. I don’t know any kings, but if one came over, I guess he’d be comfortable. “Oh, you’re a king, you say? Well, you won’t believe what I have in store for you.”
* A snake bite emergency kit is a body bag.
* When I was a boy, I laid in my twin size bed, wondering where my brother was.
* I don’t have a microwave oven, but I do have a clock that occasionally cooks stuff.
* I want to get a job naming kitchen appliances. That seems easy; refrigerator, toaster, blender. You just say what the thing does and add “er”.
* Mr. Pibb is a poor imitation of Dr. Pepper. Dude didn’t even get his degree.
* A mini-bar is a machine that makes everything expensive. When I take something out of the mini-bar, I always fathom that I’ll go and replace it before they check it off, but they make that stuff impossible to replace. I go to the store and ask, “Do you have coke in a glass harmonica? Do you have individually wrapped cashews?”
* Why are there no “during” pictures?
* I never joined the army because at ease was never that easy to me. Seemed rather uptight still. I don’t relax by parting my legs slightly and putting my hands behind my back. That does not equal ease. At ease was not being in the military. I am at ease, bro, because I am not in the military.
* I opened-up a yogurt, underneath the lid it said, “Please try again.” because they were having a contest that I was unaware of. I thought maybe I opened the yogurt wrong. Or maybe Yoplait was trying to inspire me. “Come on Mitchell, don’t give up!” An inspirational message from your friends at Yoplait, fruit on the bottom, hope on top.

Week in Wine

German Rieslings!

Erben von Beulwitz Kaseler Nies’chen Spatlese: $23 semidry
Bert Simon Serrig Wurtzberg Spatlese: $22 semidry
Graff Urziger Wurzgarten Auslese: $22 sweet
Dr. Loosen Urziger Wurzgarten Spatlese: $25 semidry
Dr. Loosen Wehlener Sonnenuhr Auslese: $40 semidry
Dr. von Bassermann- Jordan Forster Jesuit- engarten Spatlese: $28 semidry
Georg Albrecht Schneider Niersteiner Hipping Spatlese Rheinhessen: $15 semidry
Georg Albrecht Schneider Niersteiner Hipping Auslese: $21 sweet
J. L. Wolf Wachenheimer Belz Spatlese: $13 semidry
J.L. Wolf Forster Pechstein Spatlese: $28 semidry
Langwerth von Simmern Erbacher Marcobrunn Spatlese: $28 semidry
Langwerth von Simmern Hattenheimer Mannberg Spatlese: $32 semidry
Langwerth von Simmern Rauenthaler Baiken Auslese: $35 sweet
Studert-Prum Graacher Himmelreich Spatlese: $21 semidry
Von Hovel Estate Mosel-Saar-Ruwer QbA: $15
Domdechant Werner Hoccheimer Stein Kbnt halbrocken: $20
Dr. Weins-Prum Wehlener Sonnenuhr Kabinett: $15
Dr. Fischer Ockfener Bockstein QbA: $13
Dr. Loosen Dr. L Mosel-Saar-Ruwer QbA: $14
Dr. Loosen Urziger Wurzgarten Kabinett: $20
Dr. Pauly-Bergweiler Bernkasteler a. Badstube am Doctorberg Kabinett: $22
Erben von Beulqitz Kaseler Nies’chen Kabinett: $15
Gunderloch Jean-Baptiste Rheinhessen Kabinett: $19
Josef Rosch Leiwener Klostergarten Kabinett: $15
Kunstler Hochheimer Reichestal Kabinett: $22
Langwerth von Simmern Hattenheimer Nussbrunnen Kabinett; $17
Prinz zu Salm Dalberg’sches Schloss Wallhausen Kabinett: $19
Reichsgraf von Kesselstatt Piesporter Goldtropfchen Kabinett: $21
Reichsgraf von Kesselstatt RK Mosel-Saar-Ruwer QbA: $13
Reichsrat von Buhl Maria Schneider Pfalz QbA: $15
Schloss Lieser Estate Mosel-Saar-Ruwer Kabinett: $19
Schloss Saarstein Serriger Schloss Saarsteiner Kabinett: $19
Schloss Schonborn Rheingau Kabinett: $16
Schloss Schonborn Hattenheimer Pfaffenberg Kabinett: $17
Schloss Vollrads Estate Rheingau Kabinett: $20
Von Hovel Oberemmeler Hutte Kabinett: $20
Von Othegraven Maria v. O.Saar QbA: $16
Von Schubert Maximin Grunhauser Estate Mosel-Saar-Ruwer QbA: $18
Von Schubert Maximin Grunhauser Herrenberg Msl-Saar-Rwr Kabinett: $22
Wegeler Wehlener Sonnenuhr Kabinett: $16
Werner & Sohn Schweicher Annaberg Kabinett: $14
Zilliken Saarburger Rausch Kabinett: $22

Caution: Wines listed are available but may not be in all stores. Start with local wine merchants, but also try larger stores. I get my wine from BevMo. Drinking during pregnancy is associated with birth defects.

Nippon Nowadays

Three (3) more days until it opens!
If you are in Japan this summer, check out the Expo 2005
This is the official site dedicated to the U.S. pavilion
Japan tourism site and weather
Air travel to and within Japan

Coming back to us, petrol’s rising again
U.S. retail petrol prices have increased dramatically reflecting in fat returns for the likes of Chevron and friends. Retain petrol prices per gallon increased from approximately $1 in January 2002 to $2 this month. In 1980, the price first topped $1. Since then, we have gotten used to petrol being over the magic number which is why it does not hurt as much. While relatively stable in the early and mid 1990s, they have fluctuated more since 1999. Prices are,however, not record highs when taking inflation into account. When index adjusted for inflation, petrol in the 1970s cost $3 per gallon. Current prices are far below the 1981 inflation-adjusted peak of $2.94 even though it has shot up to those peak prices seen during both Persian Gulf Wars.

Compare your guzzling habits if you lived in, say, Texas
Look at petrol prices in Europe.
Compare your local petrol station globally

Hare Raising

In pagan times, the Easter hare was a sacred companion to the old Goddess of Spring, Eastre. The Easter Bunny has its origin in pre-Christian fertility Lore.
The Hare and Rabbit were the most fertile animals known and served as symbols of the new life of Spring. Parents told you that the Hare would bring presents at the Spring festival. Presents were often painted eggs (new life). Hares look like rabbits, are larger and wild. But they are quite rare. The rabbit has nearly completed replaced the hare in most countries.

In 16th century German writings, the bunny was first mentioned in writing. In the mid 1800s, the first edible bunnies (pastry and sugar) were made. German children made nests of grass in their yards, imaging the bunny would populate them with the colorful decorated eggs. Germans settling in Dutch Pennsylvania during the 1700s introduced this to America. The arrival of the Oschter Haws is second only to Christ-Kindel getting you presents on Xmas ever. Boys would use their caps and girls their bonnets as nests. Elaborate baskets came later as Hallmark saw incentive.

Get your Christian calendar right this week -

Palm Sunday: The sixth and last Sunday of Lent and beginning of Holy Week
Shrove Tuesday: Clean the soul, and celebrate as last chance to feast before Lent begins.
Ash Wednesday: Beginning of Lent, a day of penitence to clean the soul before the Lent fast.
Maundy Thursday: Day of the Last Supper, when Jesus washed the feet of his disciples and established the ceremony known as the Eucharist.
Good Friday: Death and later resurrection of Jesus Christ

Mister Coffee

Nothing smells better in the morning than a strong cup of coffee. So many coffee makers out there. So many choices. Disclaimer: I have never tasted instant coffee.

Blade coffee grinders
Pro:
cheap
easy to clean
Con:
inconsistent grounds size
burn coffee from high heat generation

Burr coffee grinders -
Pro:
crush between grinding whel and stationary surface
less burning
better grind consistency is you use the timer
Con:
noisier
can clog chute because of high speed (esp flavored beans that are oily)
static build up (no big whoop: just tap)
messy and harder to clean

French coffee press -
Pro:
perfect for 1-2 cups of black coffee
Con:
need to drink immediately as rapid loss of temperature as no heat supplied

Percolator -
Pro:
cheap
Con:
too long brewing time
foul smelling coffee
last drops are dilute and cold

Drip brewer -
Pro:
drip hot water through grounds through filter into jug or carafe
Con:
too many choices
How to choose the correct drip brewer:

1. Pick a name brand, preferably one whose replacement parts do not require FedEx. Braun and Mr. Coffee are reliable and widely available.
2. Check stated brewing time: it should be under right (8) minutes. Vacuum coffee makers and percolators do not make a good pot of coffee every time.
3. Correct water temperature should be between 195 and 205 degrees. Any hotter and it destroys the volatile oils. Any lower and it’s not coffee but foul water.
4. Optional features are just that: variable volume (cup setting), variable function (coffee, espresso, capuccino), user-settable thermostat, automatic timers and milk steamers/frothers. They add to the cost and movable parts which need cleaning a lot. Combination drip/espresso machines are painfully involved and are better supplanted by those scary pod-like machines that brew perfectly every time: a good buy if you like flavored coffees. Also called single serve coffee machines, the leading brands are Melitta, Senseo and Black & Decker. Correct brews with various flavors ready quickly every time but they are pre-ground, an ongoing expense and you have limited range depending on the vendor (flavorwise). I use pods at work but would not buy them for home use.
5. Absolute must-have features: cord storage (they are always too long for something that is invariable on the countertop and thus a safety hazard), removable filter basket, water marking (on the tower), pause and serve function (to interrupt brewing), warming plate
6. Relative must-have features: programmability, timer, inbuilt grinder

How to make the perfect cup of coffee

1. Buy a medium to expensive good quality name brand drip brewer
2. Run cold water before first use and thoroughly clean after each use to eliminate residue
3. If you are in college, you probably re-use grounds to save $ (limit = 10 re uses). i reused tea bags a long time ago. It was a VERY long time ago. If you are not in college, please buy new grounds.
4. You must use a filter. Paper filters far superior to gold (colored) or silver (colored) metal ones. They are cheap in office supply stores. I am not encouraging stealing them from your office supply store. As if that thought would ever occur to you on your own.
5. Freeze your beans in an airtight container. While it is best to roast them and grind them, who has the time. Grinding before brewing is a good idea but you can also get them groudn to the desired consistency at your local greengrocer’s (my Safeway does it but not too well).
6. Use cold still water, preferably whatever you drink (bottled?), as the water is the key to the taste. Water dilution and coffee amounts vary by taste. Add dairy and sugar after pouring out into a coffee cup or (gasp!) mug with a friendly or pithy saying on it.
7. Thermal carafes are better than glass carafes at keeping coffee hot. Do not foolishly microwave. It is just not the same. Coffee must be drunk within one (1) hour of brewing.

Coffee house lingo:
I learnt this from my Italian friend to look smart for my barista at the Bourgeois Pig . All that soy stuff I learnt in California (“I’ll have a half double decaffeinated half-caf, with a twist of lemon) from Steve Martin:
Espresso (“fast coffee”): One shot. Strong flavor. Small amount. Black.
Macchiato (“to stain/mark”): Espresso + 1 tsp milk. Espresso con Panna uses cream instead
Cappuccino (“baby coffee”): Equal volumes of coffee and milk wih foam topping
Cafe Latte (latte is milk in IT): 1 volume espresso to 3 volumes milk
Mocha (“brown”): Equal volumes espresso and steamed chocolate milk with foam toppping
Doppio (“double”): 2 shots of espresso in an espresso cup. Lungo (“long shot”) is 1.5
Ristretto (“restricted”): Short pungent concentrated form of espresso
Americano: Espresso diluted with steamed water

Good coffee information sites
Review (this is a great site!), Terminology, Varieties

Week in Wine

WHITES

2003 Beringer California Chenin Blanc ($6)
2003 Black Swan Vineyards South Eastern Australia Chardonnay ($8)
2004 Canyon Road California Sauvignon Blanc ($8)
2004 Hogue Columbia Valley Gewurztraminer ($9)
2004 Hogue Columbia Valley Pinot Grigio ($10)

REDS

2003 Black Swan Vineyards South Eastern Australia Merlot ($8)
2003 Canyon Road California Merlot ($8)
2002 Cypress California Merlot ($10)
2002 Domaine Saint George Sonoma County Merlot ($10)
2002 Stone Cellars by Beringer California Merlot ($10)

MARLBOROUGH SAUVIGNON BLANCS
2004 Allan Scott Marlborough Sauvignon Blanc: $19
2004 Allan Scott Vineyard Select Marlborough Sauvignon Blanc: $14
2004 Babich Winemakers Reserve Marlborough Sauvignon Blanc: $16
2004 Babich Marlborough Sauvignon Blanc: $12
2004 Belmonte Marlborough Sauvignon Blanc: $17
2004 Brancott Vineyards Marlborough Sauvignon Blanc: $11
2004 Fairhall Downs Marlborough Sauvignon Blanc: $16
2004 Goldwater New Dog Marlborough Sauvignon Blanc: $20
2004 Nobilo Icon Marlborough Sauvignon Blanc: $20
2004 Huia Marlborough Sauvignon Blanc: $18
2004 Lake Chalice Marlborough Sauvignon Blanc; $14
2004 Lawson’s Dry Hills Marlborough Sauvignon Blanc: $15
2003 Marlborough Wines Marlborough Sauvignon Blanc: $16
2004 Monkey Bay Marlborough Sauvignon Blanc: $10
2004 Mount Riley Marlborough Sauvignon Blanc: $13
2004 Nautilus Marlborough Sauvignon Blanc; $17
2004 Omaka Springs Estates Marlborough Sauvignon Blanc; $17
2004 Redcliffe Marlborough Sauvignon Blanc: $11
2004 Spy Valley Marlborough Sauvignon Blanc: $18
2004 Terrace Heights Estate Marlborough Sauvignon Blanc: $19
2004 Twin Islands Marlborough Sauvignon Blanc: $12
2004 Vavasour Marlborough Sauvignon Blanc: $18
2004 Villa Maria Cellar Selection Marlborough Sauvignon Blanc: $20
2004 Villa Maria Private Bin Marlborough Sauvignon Blanc: $13
2004 Whitehaven Marlborough Sauvignon Blanc: $17
2004 Wither Hills Marlborough Sauvignon Blanc: $23

Rieslings under $10
Pacific Rim Riesling 2003 (CA)
Beringer 2003 Johannisberg (CA)
Firestone Vineyard’s Select Riesling 2004 (CA)
Robert Mondavi Private Selection Johannisberg 2003 (CA)
Kendall-Jackson Vintner’s Reserve Riesling 2004 (CA)
Fetzer Vineyards Valley Oaks Riesling 2004 (CA)
Wynns Coonawarra Estate Riesling 2002 (Aus)
Hogue Cellars Johannisberg Riesling 2004 (Washington)
Felton Road Riesling 2004 (NZ)
Rosemount Estate Diamond Traminer Riesling (Aus)

WINE TRIVIA
How much wine is in a bottle? 750 ml
How many grapes does it take to make your average bottle of wine? 2 ½ pounds
How many bottles of wine does it take to make create a case of wine? 12
How many gallons of wine are produced from one acre of grapevines? About 800
Where does the vanilla flavor in wine come from? Newer oak barrels
When was the corkscrew designed? Mid-1800’s.
How many varieties of wine grapes exist in the world today? Over 10,000
How many gallons of wine does California produce annually? Over 17 million gallons
How many calories are in a four ounce glass of red wine? 85
How many gallons of wine are in a single barrel? 60
How many grapevines generally make up an acre? 400
When did winemaking begin? Mesopotamia in 6000 B.C.

http://wine.about.com/od/servingwines/a/Cookingwithwine.htm?nl=1

Caution: Wines listed are available but may not be in all stores. Start with local wine merchants, but also try larger stores. I get my wine from BevMo. Drinking during pregnancy is associated with birth defects.

Junk Bonds

Seven percent of ninth-graders admit to steroid use without a doctor’s prescription, according to the CDC, and in a study of suburban New York students, 44 percent of 12th-grade athletes admitted using creatine (a muscle and performance enhancing supplement). Since drug penalties aren’t working, the American Academy of Pediatrics now wants doctors, parents, and coaches to prohibit young athletes from using steroids and performance-enhancing drugs.”We’re creating a society of kids who just take a pill to improve performance and to gain an unfair advantage,” said Dr. Eric Small, chairman of the AAP committee. Getting parents involved seems like a good start. The continuing public psychoanalysis of Barry Lamar Bonds took a dramatic leap Tuesday when the indomitable himself admitted defeat at the hands of “everybody.” It was depressing to watch his interview on ESPN. He even had the camera focus on his son Nikolai. Pathetic.

This follows the charade that was the Committee on Government Reform’s hearing onMLB and the use of performance-enhancing drugs. Here are their testimonies: Denise Garibaldi, Donald Hooton, Kirk Bower, Jose Canseco, Sammy Sosa, Rafael Palmeiro, Mark McGwire:
http://www.newsaic.com/ftvdsindex.html

Pot Luck

Marijuana causes memory problems, learning disability, distorted perception, difficulty ith thinking and problem solving, loss of coordination, increased heart rate, anxiety, paranoia and panic attacks. While the initial effects created by the THC (there are hundreds of additional volatile compounds in addition to tetrahydrocannabinol), wear off within two (2) hours, the terminal half life of THC is 20 hours to 10 days, depending on the potency of the THC used. It should be, people argue, legalized for medical use because it suppresses nausea, relieves eye pressure, decreases muscle spasms, stimulates appetite, stops convulsions and eliminates menstrual pain. It has been used in patients with cancer, AIDS, glaucoma, epilpesy and multiple sclerosis.

Nine U.S. states permit it use in pot clubs: Alaska, Arizona, California, Colorado, Hawaii, Maine, Nevada, Oregon and Washington. CA voters legalized it for medicinal purposes by passing Proposition 215 in 1996. All you need is an ID card, a (general) business license and approval from neighboring premises up to 100 feet from your club. Demand for medical marijuana has grown sharply since the Health Department began issuing ID cards four years ago.

Year: Cards issued
2000: 754
2001: 2,089
2002: 2,270
2003: 3,085
2004: 7,014

Number of San Francisco cannabis clubs: 34.
Regulations: None
Number of Oakland cannabis clubs: Four.
Regulations: Four-club limit within the city, $5,000 to $20,000 licensing fee, zoning, monitoring

Borscht Belch

Yakov is a funny comedian. Not enough reason to visit Branson IMHO. Yet.

Vodka is a clear spirit of high purity that can be made from a wide range of raw materials, mostly grain is used. Vodka is often considered a tasteless, odorless spirit suitable only for mixing or inducing drunkenness. The U.S. government might define vodka as a clear neutral spirit of no discernable flavour or aroma, and many vodkas aspire to this standard. But even among these, there is a quite noticable variation in quality. Eastern-style vodkas have a lot more flavour, or “character.” Someone asked me to rate vodkas. I rotate preferences. I like Ketel One currently. For an unofficial rating, check this out. There is a right way to drink vodka. I must have a vodka tasting party soon.

But if you were to fly to Branson, try Kayak. Direct competition for Orbitz or Travelocity, its server is really slow. For local regional travel (within California), I much prefer now and forever, for peanuts!

Il Manifesto

Giuliana Sgrena has been working with at the daily “il manifesto” since 1988. Born in Piedmont, Giuliana studied in Milan and now always works at the foreign desk. A passionate expert of the Arab world she also dealt extensively with issues and stories concerning the Horn of Africa, the Middle East and the Maghreb. She covered for il manifesto the war in Afghanistan and the various stages of the Iraqi conflict: she was in Baghdad during the bombing of the city (and for this she was awarded by the President of Italy the title of merit “Cavaliere del Lavoro”) and returned many times again in order to describe the daily life of the Iraqis, documenting in a professional manner the violence caused by the occupation of the country. Together with her journalistic endeavours Giuliana also devotes her time to political issues. During the 1980’s she was among the founders of the peace movement: she was one of the speakers during the first mass peace demonstration. She left for Baghdad on the 23rd of January. Her recent hostage experience has been widely derided as a hoax by the MSM. Here is her version in the Italian original.

Jazz Chicago

Always check local listings as evening depends entirely upon local performers!

Andy’s
Back Room
Barn of Barrington
Bill’s Blues Bar
Black Orchid
Candlestick Maker
Cotton Club (caution: upscale dress or you will be outvelvetroped)
Elbo Room
Empty Bottle
Fly Me to the Moon
Gateway Lounge
Green Dolphin Street
Green Mill (personal recommendation)
HotHouse
Jazz Showcase
Jilly’s Piano Bar
Joe’s Be-Bop Cafe and Jazz Emporium
Lobby Court
New Apartment Lounge
Pops for Champagne (personal recommendation)
Rosa’s Lounge
Smoke Daddy
The Note
Underground Wonder Bar
Velvet Lounge (personal recommendation)

Cuisine Chicago

One place has it all but I have some new recommendations:
Russian Tea Time near the Symphony Center. Reserve online and get a free vodka flight. Get a table in the backroom on Wednesdays for discounted vodka and caviar service. Get the home brewn Russian tea, rich in currants: eat an ice cube and gargle with tea.

Green Zebra: My new favorite vegan. Comfort food. The White Cosmo (whie cranberry, Absolut courant, cointreau). Loved it!

Osteria Via Stato – Affordable prix fixe meals. Nice rustic Italian decor.

Pizza for California?
Gino’s East: ship it to go on United. Giordano’s also does overnight delivery of stuffed pizza
All pizzas are partially baked, frozen and packed with dry ice and cooking directions in a special shipping container and shipped via FedEx Standard Overnight Service. Maybe I should try Zachary’s again?

My private restaurant for a nice weekday lunch inside (yes inside) a picture window is still Pane Caldo on 72 East Walton StreetChicago, Illinois 60611-1420. No web site. No frills. No reservations. No fuss. 649-0055.

New this Spring:
Karyn’s Cooked: raw food, vegan, Lincoln Park
Sal & Carvao: churrascaria, prix-fixe, River North
Blue Water Grill: seafood, River North
Alibi: late night pizza, River North
Kitsch’n River North: retro diner
Golden Budha: Chinese steakhouse
Francesca’s Forno: Mia Francesca spinoff, WIcker Park
Scylla: posh, pricey, picky
socca: Eurobistro, Wrigleyville
Red Ginger: eclectic Thai, Belmont
Hot Chocolate: cafe and dessert bar, Wicker Park
Tanoshii: Clark, sushi
Morton’s: downtown sibling to the big State Street steakhouse
Indie Cafe: Thai + sushi, Edgewater
Simply Soup Co.: Lincoln Park
Rancho Luna en el Paseo: Humboldt Park, Cuban-Puerto Rican
Marrakech Cuisine: Wicker Park
Volo: organic, Roscoe
Sausalito Restaurant & Martini Bar: expensive martini
Masck: not ordinary burgers
Kizoku Sushi & LoungeHot Doug’s: duck-fat fries! on California
Usagi Ya: Ukrainian village, tea rooms, Thai-Chinese-Japanese
X/O Chicago: Northalstead, small plates

Alsatian Sensation

Some great whites are made in Alsace but France forbids growers from planting any Chard or Sauvignon Blanc in the NE of France. All Alsatian wines are packaged in tall fluted bottles of avrying shades of green. This is exclusive to this region. Alsace makes dry whites (Riesling, Gewurtztraminer, Pinot Gris and Muscat) unlike their sweeter shadows across the German border. Most imported Alsatians found here are bargains, costing less than $20 (see below). Alsatians cannot be duplicated becuase of the tender combination of soil, climate and culture of the growing area. They are well suited for stir-fry and Thai food. Some say Indian food but I disagree: very few spirits go well with chicken tikka masala.

Alsace is decidedly francoteutonic, retaining Germanic names for places and fmaily, but with cobbled streets, half timbered buildings and flower boxes that are deucedly francaise. It is where gemutlichkeit meets savoir faire. Alsatian fare is pork and cheese tart, coq au Riesling and casserole of sauerkraut and pork products. The Vosges are a natural barrier and make the region the driest in France. Vineyards have variable soil formation, including limestone, clay and marble. Unlike French wines that are labeled by region, Alsatin wines are labeled by grape (so Americain, these Alsatians). There are no oakey flavors (like vanilla) and this is conscious.

There are only seven (7) grapes grown:
(a) Sylvaner: light, fresh, fruity
(b) Pinot Blanc: well-balanced, supple, racy
(c) Riesling: is king – crisp, brisk, acidic and minerally (not a real word)
(d) Gewurtztraminer: robust, full, sweet with lichee and rose flavors. Bouquet!
(e) Tokay-Pinot Gris is luscious and opulent with apricot flavors but not heavy. It is different from the Italian Pinot Grigio (faux pas alert!) which is lighter and crisper. TPG is perfect for salmon. Pinot d’Alsace has apple and pear flavors, and makes a great aperitif.
(f) Muscat d’Alsace: dry, fresh tasting
(g) Pinot Noir: dry red or rose, reminds me of cherry

Appellations:
AOC Alsace – bear name of grape variety of origin
AOC Alsace Grand Cru – must show variety of grape and vineyard of growth
AOC Cremant d’Alsace – sparkling Pinot of methode Champagnoise
When you buy imports, insure they have the basic quality level (Appellation Alsace Controlee) and don’t pay over $20. Reserves are more complex and usually cost up to $75. They have funny intriguing names. 5% of the wines are “Appellation Alsace Grad Cru Controlee” and include the name of the source vineyard (only 50). Most exceed $30 and some may exceed $100. Late harvest wines (only 3% of the harvest) are Vendange Tardive or Selection de Grains Nobles. These are really sweet nectars and frightfully expensive. I would wait for a Saturday dinner to serve them. Your best bet is to look for tall green bottles that look not enough French and not enough German.

Alsatians are best served chilled but not too cold in long stemmed glasses. Cremant colder in flutes. Best enjoyed when young (1 to 5 years after harvest) but Grands Crus, Vendages tardives and SGN will benefit from longer ageing.

Some fine Alsatians:
2003 Hugel Alsace Gentil ($11)
2003 Hugel Alsace Cuvee Les Amours Pinot Blanc ($13)
2003 Domaines Schlumberger Alsace Les Princes Abbes Pinot Blanc ($18)
2001 Trimbach Alsace Reserve Pinot Gris ($17)
2001 Domaines Schlumberger Alsace Les Princes Abbes Pinot Gris ($21)
1999 Domaines Schlumberger Alsace Grand Cru Spiegel ($31)
2002 Domaine Zind Humbrecht Alsace Clos Windsbuhl Pinot Gris ($68)
2001 Marc Kreydenweiss Alsace Clos Rebberg Pinot Gris ($75)
2001 Marc Kreydenweiss Alsace Andlau Riesling ($17)
2002 Trimbach Alsace Riesling ($17)
2003 Hugel Alsace Riesling ($18)
2002 Domaines Schlumberger Alsace Les Princes Abbes Riesling ($20)
2001 Domaines Schlumberger Alsace Grand Cru Saering ($21)
2001 Hugel Alsace Jubilee Riesling ($40)
2002 Domaine Zind Humbrecht Alsace Gueberschwihr Riesling ($34)
1999 Trimbach Alsace Cuvee Frederic Emile Riesling ($35)
2002 Domaine Zind Humbrecht Alsace Clos Hauserer Riesling ($56)
2002 Trimbach Alsace Gewurztraminer ($17)
2001 Josmeyer Alsace Les Folastries Gewurztraminer ($20)
2001 Domaines Schlumberger Alsace Grand Cru Kessler Gewurztraminer ($37)

Caution: Wines listed are available but may not be in all stores. Start with local wine merchants, but also try larger stores. I get my wine from BevMo. Drinking during pregnancy is associated with birth defects.

Lodging Chicago

The Drake. 537 rooms. 74 suites. Amazing appointments. You must stay here. Full stop.

The quaint seafood themed Cape Cod Room is kitschy but fun. Bookbinder soup with a microcarafe of sherry.
Coq d’Or boasts the Executive Martini (price depends on hooch). Must get menu.
Drake Bros. is the new steakhouse. Middling service. Subpar food.

You can get great deals on Chicago Downtown hotels by calling direct. They always seem to want to get rid of empty rooms (there are plenty). One trick is to book a non-Mile facing hotel (on State, Rush, Wabash) and call in the prior Wednesday to check for upgrades, aggregators and better hotels. This map tells you the locations. Never go for a package. Get the basic room rate and then upgrade when you check in. Always ask for the highest room possible and facing away from the Mile.

Tulip Days on the Mag Mile. Shop till you drop and then eat/drink, so you can shop some more. Living on the MM is the new trend. Even the Palmolive Building is going condo! The floorplans are under 5000 sqf but cost over $10.2M. Do I hear property taxes?
Built for one of the world’s leading soap manufacturers, this office building (“a monument to cleanliness”) was the first commercial skyscraper built far from the Loop – at the northern end of Michigan Avenue. It is one of the country’s premier Art Deco-style “set-back” skyscrapers, the design of which were influenced by municipal zoning laws and the dramatic renderings of New York architect Hugh Ferris. The building was designed by one of Chicago’s oldest and most prestigious architectural firms, whose other significant buildings include the 333 North Michigan Building, the Chicago Board of Trade, and the former Chicago Daily News Building. A navigational beacon operated atop the building from 1930-1981. It was known as the Playboy Building from 1965 to 1989, when it served as headquarters for Playboy magazine.

The fabled old Chicago Historic Water Tower that survived the Great Chicago Fire of 1871 is a North Michigan Avenue landmark. It is also home to the Water Tower Place Mall as shopping is the primary activity along this Magnificent Mile. The Museum of Contemporary Art and the Terra Museum of American Art are located along this corridor. Upscale shops and boutiques line Oak Street, located just west of Michigan Avenue.The Gold Coast to the north of upper Michigan Ave and Streeterville to the east are some of Chicago’s most affluent neighborhoods. Find out how you can own your condo there. I checked out the models for the “yooge” residential condos at the Trump Hotel and Tower.

Jackie O: The White House Years. How she used a pillbox hat to captivate the peasants. Now at the Field Museum. I clearly enjoyed the Museum of Contemporary Art more, especially their more disturbing compositions. Currently featuring tourism through photographs. At the MSI is the BodyWorlds exhibit. Somehow, not very interesting. It is like another day at work to me is all.

City Walk

Ever been to Jack Early Park? It is close to COIT tower. Grant @ Pfeiffer. Walk up stairs to overlook Pier 39. From “Stairway Walks in San Francisco” suggests some walks in the city. To re-energize, consider lunch at House of Nanking (Kearny between Jackson and Pacific) and check out the Labyrinths at Grace Cathedral

Get more information about free Walking Tours or about walking tours in the citi. You can also travel about using the SF Muni rail system. SF Cable car fares are soon to be hiked from $3 to $5. In Chicago, the El will hike from $1.75 to $3.40 while the MTA (NY subway is still a lot of ride for the buck: $2 for the 500 miles of track!). Cheap alternates are MARTA in Atlanta staying put at $1.75 and the free Metromover in Miami. Compared to the London Underground, Indian Railways, Deutschbahn, and (my second favorite) SMRT, we are paying way too much for public transit. Of course, I would be nowhere without my BART.

Ten Visions

Diverse views of the future of Chicago’s built environment from 10 internationally renowned architects selected from an invited competition juried by architects and curators from the Art Institute’s Department of Architecture.

When in Chicago, take a lunchtime brown bag walking tour organized by the Chicago Architecture Foundation: John Hancock Building. Merchandise Mart. Chicago Board of Trade. Reliance Building. ArchiCenter is operated by the Chicago Architecture Foundation
It is located at 224 South Michigan Avenue in the Santa Fe Building, across from the Art Institute on the northwest corner of Jackson Boulevard at Michigan Avenue.
Open 361 days a year from 9–6:30 Monday–Saturday, 9–6 Sundays
312.922.3432 x 240

If your taste is more eclectic, take the short drive to Oak Park or Hyde Park for works of Frank Lloyd Wright. My favorite are works of Ludwing Mies van der Rohe.

Wendella Boats conducts a Chicago River Archietcture Tour explaining architectural styles. I recommend the 2 or 3 p.m. tours to avoid noisy River Forest kids and rushed desperate housewives from Wisconsin.

Chicago Telly

Oprah tapes at 0900 and 1200 CST on Tuesdays, Wednesdays, and Thursdays between August and November, and January through May. I want that job! For tickets, ring 312.591-9222, Monday through Friday, 0900-1700 tween 9:00am – 5:00pm, CST. But to have more fun, you need to be a shrieking guest or where’s the fun? BTW, I did not get a free car.

There are some local and national programs that tape their shows before live studio audiences here. In all cases, tickets are available free of charge but you usually have to call or write ahead to reserve a ticket to these shows:
“The Jerry Springer Show” (Syndicated nationally)
His nationally televised talk show is well known for guests fighting on stage and shouting foul language, as well as having strippers and exotic dancers performing on various episodes. Since May 1999, his talk shows now adhere to a no-violence rule, in which guests cannot fight on stage, use foul language, or perform lewd or obscene acts.

“The Chicago Bears Weekly” (Local on WBBM)
Chicago Bears Weekly630 N. McClurg Court312-944-6000Players and coaches guest. Weekly analysis of Chicago Bears. Taped before a live audience every Thursday during football season and airs the following Saturday at 10:30 p.m.No advance tickets available. Free admission is on a first come, first seated basis. Seating begins at 6:30 p.m. Maximum capacity is 150 for studio audience.

Chicago Comedy

Zanie’s!
Second City: As usual, outstanding. Brian Gallivan – there’s a name to file away. Red Scare is the current scripted perf but stick around after the late show for some improv
Chicago Improv.

Not quite Improv, but I enjoyed Hershey Felder (he is common law married to the twice-divorced much older first woman PM of Canada, Kim Campbell) in George Gershwin Alone at the Royal George on Halstead. Read the production diary online.

Ever been stuck in a bar with someone undesirable who asked for your number?
Give them Jeff Goldblatt’s instead: 248-262-6861
Detroit produces the most calls to the Rejection Hotline, a free telephone service that allows uninterested objects of affection to blow off come-ons. It works like this: You’re asked for your telephone number by someone in whom you have no interest. You might sound receptive by responding, “248-262-6861.”

When that number is dialed, this is what they get: “The person who gave you this number did not want you to have their real number. Maybe the idea of going out with you just seems as appealing as playing leapfrog with unicorns . … Do your best to forget about the person who gave you this number because, trust us, they’ve already forgotten about you.”

The voice is that of Jeff Goldblatt, a 27-year-old Emory University student who developed Rejection Hotline in 2001. It now serves 29 cities in the United States. The Detroit line has logged more than 1.2 million calls since it was launched last year, making it the most dialed of the 29 hotlines.

Millennium Park

You must go to Millennium Park. It has increased tourism revenue manifold! Check out the official site

Too many people are asking me to explain what the “Bean” is. The real name is “Cloudgate“. This article says it well. It is under wraps for corrugation now and will reopen in Summer.

Dance Chicago

Big Chicks: lesbian, adult videos play
Blu
Bungalow: retro kitsch
Cell Block: leather, cages
Chromium: like Studio 54 only it’s not
Circuit: gay
Club Babalu: salsa!
Club Mambo: serous latino dancers
Crobar: true party people
Dragon Room: hubba hubba hot people alert!
Estate
Excalibur: nostalgic for me as the first Chicago club I visited

Exit: yes, they’ve still got the rack and the chain mail; dodgy hood
Fly Bar
Funky Buddha Lounge: little too funky and too little Buddha for me
Get Me High Lounge
Hunt Club: sophisticated sports bar cum dance club
Ice Bar
Level: for the ultra rich so you need to be on some kind of list
Minx: boho chic
Neo: goth
Pasha
Plush
Prop House: non dancers need not apply
Rive Gauche: europop
Sound-Bar
Spin: gay
Star Gaze: lesbian
SYN
The Loft
Tonic Room: lounge lizard and part hip hop
Voyeur
Wet
Xippo
Zentra: Bollywood

Please check local listings. Dance clubs open under new names with notable frequency.

Week in Wine

WHITES
2003 Meridian Vineyards California Pinot Grigio ($7)
2003 Montevina California Pinot Grigio ($8)
2003 Stone Cellars by Beringer California Chardonnay ($7)

REDS
2002 Black Opal South Eastern Australia Cabernet Sauvignon ($7)
2003 Dona Paula Estate Lujan de Cuyo Cabernet Sauvignon ($10)
2003 Dona Paula Estate Lujan de Cuyo Malbec ($10)
2003 Dona Paula Estate Tupungato Merlot ($10)
2002 Lindemans Reserve South Australia Cabernet Sauvignon ($10)
2002 Lindemans Reserve South Australia Merlot ($10)
NV Sacred Stone Master’s Red Blend ($8)

Cooking with wine

Which wine to use: cook with a wine that you would drink. Only the alcohol diminishes during the cooking process, not the poor quality or undesirable flavor.
Commercially sold “cooking wines” are cheap, salty and incorporate spices or herbs.
Flavor a recipe with wine as you would adding a spice.
Flavors mellow the longer you cook the wine in the dish.
A young, strong red wine is allowed to cook for at least 45 minutes.
Reds tend to bring color, clarity and a distinctly dry characteristic to the foods they flavor. White wines are known to bring an acidic quality with a bit of pucker power.
Use reds for flavoring red sauces with red meat.
Use whites to make cream sauces or emphasize white meats or seafood.
Not all of the alcohol will evaporate from the cooking process.
I always check if any of my guests might be pregnant or attempting pregnancy.

Caution: Wines listed are available but may not be in all stores. Start with local wine merchants, but also try larger stores. I get my wine from BevMo. Drinking during pregnancy is associated with birth defects.

Year Round

January

Sea Lion’s Arrival
Bring your family to watch herds of barking sea lions returning to the Bay area. Join the crew at Pier 39 in mid-January for this annual event. (415) 705-5500

Berlin and Beyond Film Festival
Castro Theater hosts a German language film fest providing highlights of recent European cinema. Call (415) 263-8760

Independent Film Festival
Bay area directors are showcased at this annual two-week festival, beginning the last day of January, at the Roxie Cinema and Castro Theatre. Call (415) 227-2603

Chinese New Year
Extended Chinese New Year Festivities include a parade, Chinese New Year Flower Fair and a Community Street Fair. Call (415) 982-3000

Rooster Year

China unveiled a law allowing it to attack the island if it makes a move toward formal independence.
Meanwhile, interest rates are rising. If you’re looking to buy a new home, here is something useful from the senate.

Monkey Business

Witness the testimony. Decide for yourself. I would rather watch my grass grow.

Wine Travel

Here’s a really simple wine and food pairing wheel and a nice map I use

Chateau Montelena: good picnic spot
Tudal: Cab Sauv 1998. Full. Hot.
V Sattui: tasting room sells fridge magnets. Enough said.
Napa Cellars: Nice Rose
Grgich: Terrible vinegar
Artesa: Nice sculptures. Syrah 2001 nice. Check out the difference between Alex Valley and Napa Cab Sauv 2001
Chateau Boswell: Great cabs. Pre-sold (i.e., pre-bottling) like subdivisions in Dublin
Clos Pegase: Architectural fun. Sucky wines.

Tra Vigne: Noisy. Never again.
Pinot Blanc: Great rooms and courtyard. Great service.
Brix
Mustard’s: Terrible. Vomited thrice. And I wasn’t even drunk.

Some recommendations for NorCal winery getaways:
Beringer (St. Helena): Rhine House. Caves. Sampling fee. Commercial.
Montelena (Calistoga): Castle. Chinese garden lake. Picnic grounds. Estate Cab Sauv.
Clos du Val (Napa): Big tasting room. Check for times of operation.
Clos Pegase (Calistoga): Minoan Temple. Sculpture. Carneros Merlot. Caves.
Folie a Deux (St. Helena): Chenin Blanc. Cottage tasting room. Relaxing.
Milat (St. Helena): Cottage tasting room. Buttery Chardonnay. Estate varietals.
Prager Winery & Port Works (St. Helena): Tiny old tasting room. Pricey port and chocolate.
Robert Mondavi (Oakville): Guided tour. Mission style winery. Early appointment. Fume Blanc.
Robert Sinskey (Napa): Architecturally pleasing. Carneros Pinot Noir.
Rombaeur (St. Helena): By appointment only. Carneros Chardonnay. Cabernet.
Rutherford Hill (Rutherford): Complex wine cave system. Zinfandel Port. Picnic.
Silverado (Napa): Disney. Cabernet Sauvignon.
Stag’s Leap (Napa): Cab Sauv. Beckstoffer Ranch Chardonnay. Hawk Crest.
Sterling (Calistoga): Moorish. Gondola. Cafe tasting room.
Sutter Home (St. Helena): Victorian. Very commercial. White Zinfandel.
Trefethen (Napa): Gravity-flow winery. Dry Riesling. Cab Sauv (Eshkol label)
Villa Helena (St. Helena): Personal tour. Viognier. Impromptu Barrel blends. Port.

Suggestions:
For Desperate Housewives from WI: Beringer, Mondavi, Clos Pegase, Sterling, Sutter, V Sattui
For My Friends: Montelena, Sinskey, Rombauer, Silverado, Stag’s Leap
For My Family: Darioush, Tudal, Del Dotto, Pine Ridge

Caution: Wines listed are available but may not be in all stores. Start with local wine merchants, but also try larger stores. I get my wine from BevMo. Drinking during pregnancy is associated with birth defects.

Body Shoppe

Same Martha. New Body. Here, there, there and everywhere.

After serving five (5) months time in Camp Cupcake as part of her sentence on federal criminal charges, Martha Stewart will now serve five (5) months of house arrest (how perfect! she loves her house!!) during which time she can leave her house to work forty eight (48) hours a week. Her TV career will blossom. She is Chief Editorial Director and Media Director at Martha Stewart Living Omnimedia. Her daughter, Alexis, controlds nearly 60% of MSO stock.

Speaking of old people: the AARP is being challenged by United Seniors. Who will be…. the next Apprentice? I need to beef up on my Social Security 411 before I make any comments.

Add Hawk

What IS the big deal with COX-2 inhibitors?

Dan Brown’s thriller, The Da Vinci Code, has been on the NYT BS booklist for 104 weeks as of March 2005. The Da Vinci Hoax postulates that Jesus Christ was married to Mary Magdalene. Cardinal Tarcisio Bertone, the archbishop of Genoa, has condemned the book as a “sack of lies” in a Milanese newspaper. This book is found in the fiction part of your library:

If you can read Italian, read the original interview or enjoy the translation:

If you’re not among the millions who have already read the blockbuster novel The Da Vinci Code, a senior Italian cardinal has a plea for you: don’t read it and don’t buy it. Genoa Cardinal Tarcisio Bertone, a friend of the pope, said today that the runaway success of the Dan Brown novel is proof of ”anti-Catholic” prejudice containing “cheap lies”. Allegations in the novel that Jesus married Mary Magdalene and has descendants have outraged many Christians and have been dismissed by historians and theologians.

“The distribution strategy has been absolutely exceptional marketing, even at Catholic bookstores – and I’ve already complained about the Catholic bookshops which, for profit motives, have stacks of this book,” the cardinal said. The novel is on sale in the Rome hospital where the pope underwent emergency treatment earlier this month. “And then there’s that strategy of persuasion – that one isn’t an adult Christian if you don’t read this book. Thus my appeal is: don’t read and don’t buy” the book.

Bertone’s comments were significant because until the Pope named him Archbishop of Genoa in 2003 he was for years the number two man at the Vatican’s most powerful department – the Congregation for the Doctrine of the Faith. Asked about commentary that the book’s success is “only further proof of the fact that anti-Catholicism is the last acceptable prejudice,” the cardinal exclaimed: “It’s the truth.”

“There’s a great anti-Catholic prejudice,” Bertone said. ”I ask myself if a similar book was written, full of lies about Buddha, Mohammed, or, even, for example, if a novel came out which manipulated all the history of the Holocaust or of the Shoah, what would have happened?”

The Da Vinci Code was published two years ago this month and is available in 44 languages. Booksellers expect the novel to remain a best seller for some time. It is also being made into a Hollywood movie, starring Tom Hanks. “You can find that book everywhere and the risk is that many people who read it believe that those fairy tales are real,” the cardinal said. “I think I have the responsibility to clear things up to unmask the cheap lies contained in books like that.”

Cardinal Bertone will be the key speaker at a meeting in Genoa tomorrow night attempting to dismantle the book, which also accuses the Church of covering up the female role in Christianity.
“I will try to clear things up and help form consciences,” the cardinal said. Bertone firmly rejected the book’s claim that the feminine role in Christianity had been suppressed. “This is one of the most vulgar of inventions. The feminine element is present in all the Gospels,” Bertone said.

Week in Wine

Some bargain wines you should like to try:

WHITES

2004 Fetzer Valley Oaks California Sauvignon Blanc ($8)
2004 Finca El Portillo Alto Valle de Uco Sauvignon Blanc ($9)
2003 Georges Duboeuf G.D.-White Vin de Pays D’Oc Chardonnay/Sauvignon Blanc ($7)
2004 Monkey Bay Marlborough Sauvignon Blanc ($10)
2004 Oxford Landing South Australia Sauvignon Blanc ($9)

REDS

2003 Bogle California Old Vine Zinfandel ($10)
2002 Capcanes Montsant Mas Donis ($10)
2003 Georges Duboeuf G.D.-Red Vin de Pays D’Oc Syrah-Merlot ($7)
2003 Hahn Estates Central Coast Syrah ($9)
2003 Palladio Chianti ($10)

I would recommend the Livermore Valley Vineyards to everyone who cares to listen. They are smaller, lesser known but have some fine vintages indeed. If you live locally, you could visit for the day or the weekend. There are 25 major wineries and local inns offer overnight stays. There are some wonderful events as well:
* City of Light Wine Auction held at Wente Visitors Center. This benefits, among others, ValleyCare Medical Center and I am volunteering to help this Spring. May 21, 2005. 1600 PST. Auctions are both silent and live.. TO date, over $1.75 million dollars have been donated to Bay Area charities.
* Taste of Terroir is on July 14 1800 PST at the Palm Event Center
* The 24th Annual Harvest Wine Celebration is on Sunday and Monday of Labor Day weekend, and always well attended.
* California Independent Film Festival is October 27-30th in multiple vineyards
* Holidays in the Vineyards is on December 3rd and 4th
Mark your calendar for anything that interests you. Individual wineries have their own events as well.

Caution: Wines listed are available but may not be in all stores. Start with local wine merchants, but also try larger stores. I get my wine from BevMo. Drinking during pregnancy is associated with birth defects.

Happy Healdsburg

Wineries

Adrian Fog Winery
2064 Gravenstein North, Sebastopol
707-431-1174
Tasting by Appointment Only

Alderbrook Winery:
Cab sauv, merlot, pin n, zin, chard, sauv b
2306 Magnolia Dr, Healdsburg
707.433-9154

10-5. Tours 1100 & 1400

Alexander Valley Vineyards
8644 Hwy 128, Healdsburg
707.433-7209

Amphora Winery
3901 Wine Creek Road, Healdsburg
707.431-7767

Arista Winery
7015 Westside Road, Healdsburg
707-473-0606; open Thursday – Monday, 11-5. Tue & Wed by appointment only

Belvedere Winery
4035 Westside Road, Healdsburg
707-431-4442; 10-4:30
Picnic Area – Aroma Gardens, Cab Sauv, Merlot, Zin, Chard

Brutocao Cellars
13500 South Hwy 101, Hopland.
707-744-2020, 10-5.

Camellia Cellars Tasting Room
57 Front Street, Healdsburg
707-433-1290.
Cab Sauv, Zin

Canyon Road Winery
19550 Geyserville Avenue, Geyserville
707-857-3417; 10-5 daily
Picnic Area-Gourmet Food, Cab Sauv, Merlot, Chard, Sauv Blanc

Chateau Felice
10603 Chalk Hill Road, Healdsburg
707-836-9011. Visitors by appointment
Cab Sauv, Zin, Chard

Chateau Souverain
400 Souverain Road, Geyserville
707-433-8281; 10-5
Lunch & Al Fresco Menu 7days/wk –Dinner: Friday – Sunday
Cab Sauv, Merlot, Zin, Chard, Sauv Blanc

Christopher Creek Winery
641 Limerick Lane, Healdsburg
707-433-2001; Friday-Monday; 11-4
Cab Sauv, Zin, Chard

Clos Du Bois
19410 Geyserville Avenue, Geyserville
707-857-3100; 10-4:30
Cab Sauv, Merlot, Pinot N, Zin, Chard, Sauv Blanc.

Davis Family Vineyard
52 Front Street, Healdsburg
707-433-3858; M-F by appointment; Sat. & Sun. 11-5.

De La Montanya Vineyard & Winery
999 Foreman Lane, Healdsburg
707-433-3711. Open 11-5

Dry Creek Vineyard
3770 Lambert Bridge Road, Healdsburg.
707-433-1000; 10:30-4:30
Cab Sauv, Merlot, Zin, Chard, Sauv Blanc

Everett Ridge Winery
435 West Dry Creek Road, Healdsburg
707-433-1637; 11-4:30
Cab Sauv, Zin, Chard, Sauv Blanc

Family Wineries Tasting Room
4791 Dry Creek Road, Healdsburg
707-433-0100

Ferrari-Carano Winery
8761 Dry Creek Road, Healdsburg
707-433-6700; 10-5
Beautiful Architecture, Landscaped Gardens & Reflecting Pool
Cab Sauv, Merlot, Zin, Chard, Sauv Blanc.

Field Stone Winery
10075 Hwy 128, Healdsburg
707-433-7266; 10-5
Outdoor Concert Venue, Picnic Area,
Cab Sauv, Merlot, Sangio, Chard

Foppiano Winery
12707 Old Redwood Hwy, Healdsburg
707-433-7272; 10-4:30
One of the oldest family owned wineries –1896
Cab Sauv, Merlot, Zin, Chard, Sauv Blanc.

Gary Farrell Wines
10701 Westside Road, Healdsburg
707-473-2900. Daily tasting and tours by appointment.
View & Spacious Tasting Room
Cab Sauv, Merlot, Pinot N, Zin, Chard

Gallo of Sonoma Tasting Room
320 Center Street, Healdsburg
707-433-2458; Sunday.-Wednesday, 11-5; Thursday-Saturday, 11-7.
Cab Sauv, Merlot, Pinot N, Zin, Chard, Sauv Blanc.

Grove Street Winery
1451 Grove Street, Healdsburg
707-433-0290. Visitors by appointment.
Cab Sauv, Merlot, Chard

Hanna Winery
9280 Hwy 128, Healdsburg
707-431-4310; 10-4.
Picnic area with panoramic views of Alexander Valley.

Hop Kiln Winery
6050 Westside Road, Healdsburg
707-433-6491; 10-5
Picnic Area & Art Gallery, Cab Sauv, Zin, Chard

Icaria Creek Winery
27750 Asti Road, Cloverdale
707-894-8499. Visitors by appointment.
Incredible view of Alexander Valley, Cab Sauv

Jordan Winery
1474 Alexander Valley Road, Healdsburg
707-431-5250. Visitors by appointment.
Free tasting w/tour, Cab Sauv, Chard

Kendall-Jackson Tasting Room
337 Healdsburg Avenue, Healdsburg
707-433-7102;
10-5.

Lake Sonoma Winery
9990 Dry Creek Road, Geyserville
707-473-2999; Mon.-Fri. by appointment only, Sat.& Sun. 10-5.
Picnic Area-Fresh Cheeses & Bread, Cab Sauv, Zin, Chard

Lambert Bridge Winery
4085 West Dry Creek Road, Healdsburg
707-431-9600; 10-4:30
Picnic Area, Merlot, Zin, Chard, Sauv Blanc

Lancaster Estate
15001 Chalk Hill Road, Healdsburg
707-433-8178
Visitors by appointment.

Limerick Lane Cellars
1023 Limerick Lane, Healdsburg
707-433-9211
Friday-Monday, 10:30- 4:30. Zin, Syrah

Mauritson Winery
2859 Dry Creek Road, Healdsburg
707-431-0804. Open daily 10-5

Mazzocco Vineyards
1400 Lytton Springs Road, Healdsburg
707-431-8159; 10-4:30
Picnic Area, Cabernet Sauv, Merlot, Zin, Chard

Medlock Ames Winery
13414 Chalk Hill Road, Healdsburg
707-431-8845. Tasting by appointment.
Cab Sauv, Merlot and Chard

McCray Ridge
1960 Dry Creek Road, Healdsburg
707-869-3147. Visitors by appointment.
Cab Sauv, Merlot

Michel-Schlumberger
4155 Wine Creek Road, Healdsburg
707-433-7427. Visitors by appointment.
Cab Sauv, Chard

Mill Creek Vineyards
1401 Westside Road, Healdsburg
707-431-2121; 10-5
Operational Mill, Hiking, Picnic Area, Cab Sauv, Merlot, Zin, Chard, Sauv Blanc

Murphy-Goode Estate
4001 Hwy 128, Geyserville
707-431-7644; 10:30-4:30
Cab Sauv, Merlot, Pinot N, Zin, Chard, Sauv Blanc.

J. Pedroncelli Winery
1220 Canyon Road, Geyserville
707-857-3531; 10-5.
Cab Sauv, Merlot, Pinot N, Zin, Chard

Quivira Vineyards
4900 West Dry Creek Road, Healdsburg
707-431-8333; 11-5
Picnic Area, Zin, Chard

Raymond Burr Vineyards
8339 West Dry Creek Road, Healdsburg
707-433-4365. Visitors by appointment
Cab Sauv. Orchids!

Robert Young Estate Winery
4960 Red Winery Road, Geyserville
707-431-4811. Open Daily 10-4:30. Tours by appointment only.
Scion Bordeaux Blend, Chard, Merlot

Rodney Strong Vineyards
11455 Old Redwood Hwy, Healdsburg.
707-431-1533; 10-5.
Tours 11 & 3, Picnic Area, Venue for summer music series
Cab Sauv, Merlot, Chard

Rosenblum Cellars
250 Center Street, Healdsburg
707-431-1169; 10-5
Cab Sauv, Merlot, Zin, Chard

Roshambo Winery
3000 Westside Road, Healdsburg.
888-525-9563; 10:30-4:30. Tours of 10 or more by appt.,
Picnic Area & full Art Gallery, Syrah, Merlot, Zin, Chard, Sauv Blanc.

Sapphire Hill Vineyards & Winery,
51 Front Street, Healdsburg
707-431-1888; Friday-Sunday 11-4:30.
Syrah, Pinot N, Zin, Chard

Sausal Winery
7370 Hwy 128, Healdsburg.
707-433-2285; 10-4.
Picnic Area, Cab Sauv, Sangio, Zin

Seghesio Family Vineyards
14730 Grove Street, Healdsburg
707-433-3579; 10-5
Picnic Area and Bocce Ball. Sangio, Pinot N, Zin

Selby Winery,
215 Center Street, Healdsburg.
707-431-1703; 11-5.
Cab Sauv, Merlot, Pinot N, Zin, Chard

Simi Winery,
16275 Healdsburg Avenue, Healdsburg.
707-433-6981; 10- 4:30.
Tours; 11& 2, Picnic Area, Winery Old Stone Building,
Cab Sauv, Merlot, Zin, Chard, Sauv Blanc.

Thumbprint Cellars,
36 North Street, Healdsburg.
707-433-2393.
Open daily, 11-6. Locals night on Thursday, 11-8.

Toad Hollow Vineyards Tasting Room,
409A Healdsburg Avenue, Healdsburg.
707-431-8667.
Open daily 10-5pm.
Merlot, Pinot N, Zin, Chard

Trentadue Winery,
19170 Geyserville Avenue, Geyserville,
707-433-1082; 10-5
Picnic Area,
Cab Sauv, Merlot, Zin, Sangio, Port.

White Oak Vineyards & Winery,
7505 Hwy 128, Healdsburg.
707-433-8429; 10-5.
Picnic Area, Cab Sauv, Merlot, Zin, Chard, Sauv Blanc.

Windsor Vineyards,
308-B Center Street, Healdsburg.
707-433-2822; Monday-Friday; 10-5; Saturday & Sunday; 10-6.
Personalized Labels with own message or logo,
Cab Sauv, Merlot, Zin, White Zin, Chard

Wilson Winery
1960 Dry Creek Road, Healdsburg.
707-433-4355;
Visitors by Appointment Friday-Sunday; 11-5.

Yoakim Bridge Vineyard & Winery,
7209 Dry Creek Road, Healdsburg.
707-433-8511.
Tasting room Friday – Sunday, 11–4:30.

SPAS
A Simple Touch Spa
Homespa
Osmosis

DINING
Adel’s,
198 Dry Creek Road, Healdsburg. 707-433-6422.
Family restaurant; Steaks & seafood. Breakfast, daily lunch & dinner specials 6am-midnight. Banquet Facilities.
Open daily.

Anstead’s Marketplace & Deli,
428 Center Street, Healdsburg.
707-431-0530.
Natural ingredients, signature sandwiches, salads, pizza, smoothies and much more.
Monday-Friday, 11am-7pm, Saturday-Sunday, 11am-6pm.

Barndiva,
231 Center Street, Healdsburg.
707-431-0100.
Lounge Dining & Gardens. Full bar, comprehensive wine list, private event space.

Bear Republic Brewing Company,
345 Healdsburg Avenue, Healdsburg.
707-433-2337.
Hearty food & drink for the whole family. Award winning ales.
Lunch & dinner. Breakfast Saturday & Sunday, 8am-11am Catering & take-out.

Bistro Ralph,
109 Plaza Street, Healdsburg.
707-433-1380. An upscale bistro on the plaza.
Lunch Monday-Saturday, 11:30am. Dinner Monday-Saturday, 5:30-9:30pm. Reservations suggested. Closed Sundays.

Cafe Newsstand,
301 Healdsburg Avenue, Healdsburg.
707-922-5233.
Serves Peet’s coffee and espresso drinks, hot pressed Panni sandwichs, soups, salads, Gelato and desserts. Toyon Books carrying over 200 titles of magazines and newspapers.
7am-8pm

Cena Luna,
241 Healdsburg Avenue,
707-433-6000.
Italian Fare, House made pasta, weekly changing menu,
dinner Monday- Saturday, starting at 5 pm.

Center Street Café & Deli,
304 Center Street, Healdsburg.
707-433-7224.
Full breakfast served daily.
Full service deli with freshly made sandwiches & salads. Smoothies, juice bar, espresso
Monday–Friday. 6:30am-6pm. Saturday-Sunday. 7am-5pm.

Chateau Souverain Alexander Valley Grill,
400 Souverain Road Geyserville.
707-433-3141.
Lunch 7 days a week. Dinner Friday, Saturday & Sunday only. Sunday Brunch 11am-2pm Country French Cuisine.

C.K. House Chinese Restaurant
1525 Healdsburg Avenue, Healdsburg.
707-433-4122

Costeaux French Bakery,
417 Healdsburg Avenue, Healdsburg.
707-433-1913.
Gold Medal sourdough. Pastries
Tues.-Saturday. 6:30am-5pm., Sunday, 6:30am-4pm.

Crushed Grape,
13500 S. Hwy 101, Hopland.
707-744-2020.
wood-fired oven pizzas
Mon-Friday, 11am-8pm, Saturday, 11am-9pm, Sunday Brunch, 9am-3pm. Dinner until 9pm.

dÍVine Pizza,
1051 Vine Street, Healdsburg.
707-433-3660.
Gourmet-style pizza, calzone
Sunday-Thursday, 11am-9pm, Friday-Saturday, 11am.-10pm.

Dry Creek General Store,
3495 Dry Creek Road, Healdsburg.
707-433-4171.
Picnics to go. Monday-Thursday, 7am-7pm. Friday.-Sunday, 7am-9pm.

Dry Creek Kitchen,
317 Healdsburg Avenue, Healdsburg.
707-431-0330. chef Charlie Palmer.
Lunch 12pm-3pm. Sunday.-Thursday, 5pm-10pm. Friday-Saturday, 5pm-10:30 pm. Closed Wednesday. Reservations recommended.

Fitch Mountain Eddie’s,
1301 Healdsburg Avenue, Healdsburg.
707-433-7414
Caution: Family restaurant
Open 7 days a week, 7am-9pm.

Flakey Cream Do-Nuts & Coffee Shop,
441 Center Street, Healdsburg.
707-433-3895.
Full breakfast & lunch specials with homemade soups. Open 7 days a week, 5am-2:30pm.

Flying Goat Coffee,
324 Center Street, Healdsburg
707-433-9081.
Coffee roastery & café w/fresh baked goods.
Monday-Friday, 7am-6pm; Saturday-Sunday, 8am-6pm.

Giorgio’s,
25 Grant Avenue, Healdsburg.
707-433-1106. Italian cuisine. Pizza!
Dinner daily, 4pm-10pm. Lunch Monday-Friday, 11am-4pm. Outdoor patio.

Healdsburg Bar & Grill,
245 Healdsburg Avenue, Healdsburg.
707- 433-3333.
Weekly specials. Salads, pizza and sandwiches.
Opens at 11:30, Tuesday-Sunday, closed Monday.

Hoffman House Cafe,
21712 Geyserville Avenue, Geyserville.
707-857-3264.
Chef Sergio Guzman Breakfast and Lunch, Open everyday, 7:00am-3:00pm

Jimtown Store,
6706 Hwy 128, Healdsburg.
707-433-1212.
Box lunches & supper available; Wine by the glass. Espresso & old-fashioned desserts.
Patio dining. Monday-Friday, 7am-5pm. Saturday-Sunday, 7:30am-5pm.

La Pizza,
133 Healdsburg Avenue, Healdsburg.
707-433-3500.
Homemade sauce & dough. 11am-10pm.

Lotus Thai Restaurant,
109A Plaza Street, Healdsburg.
707-433-5282.
Authentic Thai cuisine.
Tuesday-Sunday, 11:30am-2:30pm & 5pm-9pm. Closed Monday.

Madrona Manor,
1001 Westside Road, Healdsburg.
707-433-4231.
California cuisine with French genre Dinner nightly. Reservations recommended.

Manzanita,
336 Healdsburg Avenue, Healdsburg.
707-433-8111.
Full service restaurant with wood burning oven. Seasonal menu focused on local purveyors. Wednesday-Sunday, 5:30pm until close.

Oakville Grocery,
124 Matheson Street, Healdsburg.
707-433-3200.
Marketplace featuring pizzas, sandwiches, salads, great picnic fare, wine bar
Open Sunday-Wednesday, 9am-7pm Thursday-Saturday, 9am-8:30pm.

Piace`re Italiano Ristorante,
504 Cloverdale Boulevard, Cloverdale.
707-894-0885.
Fine Italian dining, Pasta, Seafood, Chicken, Beef dishes, daily specials & extensive wine list. Lunch Wed.-Fri.,12pm-2pm Dinner Tuesday-Sunday, 4pm-10pm.

Quail Run Restaurant,
3250 Highway 128 East, Geyserville
707- 857-2756
Caution: Buffet. 24 hour menu. Bountiful Buffet-Lunch, 11am-2:30pm. Dinner; Sunday-Thursday, 5pm-9pm. Friday Seafood evening buffet, 5pm-10pm. Saturday Prime Rib evening buffet, 5pm-10pm. Sunday Brunch, 10:30am-2:30pm.

Ravenous Café,
420 Center Street, Healdsburg
707-431-1302.
American bistro. Menu changes twice weekly.
Lunch Wednesday- Sunday, 11:30am-2:30pm.
Dinner Wednesday-Sunday, 5pm-9pm, Friday-Saturday until 9:30pm.

Restaurant Charcuterie,
335 Healdsburg Avenue, Healdsburg.
707-431-7213.
Restaurant on the Plaza w/Mediterranean-French Cuisine; extensive local wine list.
Dinner nightly. Lunch Monday-Friday, 11:30am-3pm; Saturday, 12pm-3pm. Catering avail.

Sake’0,
505 Healdsburg Avenue, Healdsburg.
707-433-2669.
Japanese Cuisine;
Lunch Tuesday– Sunday, 11:30-2:30;
Dinner Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday & Sunday, 5-9:30pm; Friday & Saturday, dinner until 10pm.

Singletree Inn Cafe,
165 Healdsburg Avenue, Healdsburg.
707-433-8263.
Breakfast, Brunch, Lunch with daily specials including Ingram’s style chili, Breeze Inn BBQ. Fresh O.J., Espresso, Beer & Wine.
Monday-Friday, 7am-2:30pm; Saturday & Sunday, 7am-3pm.

Sushi Osaka Japanese Restaurant,
48 Healdsburg Avenue, Healdsburg.
707-431-1381.
Lunch, 11:30am-2:30pm, Dinner 5-9pm.

Thai Orchid Cuisine,
1005 Vine Street, Healdsburg,
707-433-0515
Authentic Thai food. Lunch 11am – 3 pm, Dinner 4:30 pm – 9 pm.

Willi’s Seafood & Raw Bar,
403 Healdsburg Avenue, Healdsburg.
707-433-9191.
East coast oyster bar with Latin flare. Full Bar, all wines offered by the glass or half bottle. Patio dinning.
Open for lunch and dinner at 11:30am. Closed Tuesday

Zin Restaurant & Wine Bar,
344 Center Street, Healdsburg.
707- 473-0946.
American Bistro and Wine Bar.
Lunch, Thursday-Monday, 11:30am-2pm. Dinner, Thursday-Monday, 5:30pm-10pm.

Young Turks

73 young criminals are currently on death row across the U.S.
In 1988, the Supreme Court barred the execution of capital offenders who were under 16 at the time of their crimes. In 2002, the high court stopped executions of mentally ill people as a reflection of changing thought on capital punishment. In the last 10 years, only Oklahoma, Texas and Virginia have executed persons who were under 18 when they committed their crimes, while the number of teenagers executed nation-wide has fallen significantly: 2 teens in 2003 down from 15 in 1999.